We picked up our medical clearances today (I flunked my hearing test in one ear, possibly due to that slow-draining cold, but the doctor wrote that it would not alter either my longevity or parenting ability, so we should be fine). Now we only need to collect some pictures (of the apartment and the family), write a cover letter to China, and schedule another meeting with our social worker. Well, and then fill out the big USCIS form.
Jim picked up another crib mattress today, since Gus is using his mattress in the toddler bed and I developed a hangup about taking a picture of the kids' room with only the crib springs showing.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Saturday, September 05, 2009
Moving along
It's been slow but productive few weeks. We sent out all our requests for reference letters. We started to get back child abuse clearances from our many states.
We've finished our 10 hours of parenting training now required by the Hague treaty. Our agency recommended Heart of the Matter seminars, which is run by two adoptive moms, one a teacher and one a social worker. The DVDs are basically recordings of one of their all-day seminars, but it was so much information we were glad to spread it out over a couple of week. They did a great job, really excellent information about how lacking a family causes changes in brain development and how we can help to fill in those mental and emotional building blocks with hard work once our kids get home. We did many of these things with Gus without knowing how important they were, and now they're just a part of our parenting style (bonus!). We'd be happy to lend our our videos if you're interested.
We finished researching medical needs. Well, for now--I'm sure there will be more researching once we have a referral. We have a list with which we feel pretty comfortable and will be giving it to our social worker to write into the homestudy at our next meeting.
We also had a reminder about how life will probably be for the first several weeks with a child who doesn't know us and doesn't want to be here. A good friend of ours went into premature labor and called us to take her 3-year-old for the night while her husband rushed back into town. Gus is good friends with this little girl, and she knows us reasonably well, but she still didn't want to be here with us for the night and we were the wrong people to comfort her. It'll be like that, probably, when the next munchkin comes home, only harder. Better to be prepared than not.
Next week is hopefully our first doctor's appointment. We wanted to do it this week but then I got sidelined by a nasty virus. Mostly better now, and hoping to move more quickly next week.
We've finished our 10 hours of parenting training now required by the Hague treaty. Our agency recommended Heart of the Matter seminars, which is run by two adoptive moms, one a teacher and one a social worker. The DVDs are basically recordings of one of their all-day seminars, but it was so much information we were glad to spread it out over a couple of week. They did a great job, really excellent information about how lacking a family causes changes in brain development and how we can help to fill in those mental and emotional building blocks with hard work once our kids get home. We did many of these things with Gus without knowing how important they were, and now they're just a part of our parenting style (bonus!). We'd be happy to lend our our videos if you're interested.
We finished researching medical needs. Well, for now--I'm sure there will be more researching once we have a referral. We have a list with which we feel pretty comfortable and will be giving it to our social worker to write into the homestudy at our next meeting.
We also had a reminder about how life will probably be for the first several weeks with a child who doesn't know us and doesn't want to be here. A good friend of ours went into premature labor and called us to take her 3-year-old for the night while her husband rushed back into town. Gus is good friends with this little girl, and she knows us reasonably well, but she still didn't want to be here with us for the night and we were the wrong people to comfort her. It'll be like that, probably, when the next munchkin comes home, only harder. Better to be prepared than not.
Next week is hopefully our first doctor's appointment. We wanted to do it this week but then I got sidelined by a nasty virus. Mostly better now, and hoping to move more quickly next week.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
First Social Worker Meeting
Our social worker came to our apartment on Monday morning to chat. She approved our apartment as being child-worthy, picked up the small stack of documents we had ready for her, and talked to us a while to make sure we had a reasonable idea of what we were getting into. Now that we have her contact information, those of you writing us reference letters will soon be getting your forms. This process is moving much faster than last time--our first agency meeting was only a few weeks ago!
Friday, August 14, 2009
Notary Date
Due to a happy excess of caution, we don't have to order more birth and marriage certificates. We ordered extra for Gus's paperwork in case something was lost, and we had enough left over for this dossier! Of course, if something gets lost we'll have to order more.
Had a notary date today. We had so many of these last time we eventually named them. We meet in halfway between our usual places, get things notarized, have lunch, and scatter again. This paperwork really is easier, because we can get everything notarized at once, near the beginning, rather than in spurts throughout the process. We got 9 forms notarized and mailed out all our requests for background checks (3 states each, one twice).
Also tonight we started our Hague parenting training. Taking a parenting training class is a new but a good thing. We're watching a series of DVDs; the first one was really interesting, about how children who haven't had optimal circumstances in the first few months/years of life need extra help in good brain development to process sensory experiences. We can help build good brains by mixing lots of sensory experiences with our presence and physical touch. We did these things very intentionally with Gus, just from the perspective of attachment instead of brain development. Bonus!
Had a notary date today. We had so many of these last time we eventually named them. We meet in halfway between our usual places, get things notarized, have lunch, and scatter again. This paperwork really is easier, because we can get everything notarized at once, near the beginning, rather than in spurts throughout the process. We got 9 forms notarized and mailed out all our requests for background checks (3 states each, one twice).
Also tonight we started our Hague parenting training. Taking a parenting training class is a new but a good thing. We're watching a series of DVDs; the first one was really interesting, about how children who haven't had optimal circumstances in the first few months/years of life need extra help in good brain development to process sensory experiences. We can help build good brains by mixing lots of sensory experiences with our presence and physical touch. We did these things very intentionally with Gus, just from the perspective of attachment instead of brain development. Bonus!
Monday, August 10, 2009
The Paperchase Begins
But it's not as exciting as it sounds. We had a meeting at the agency last Wednesday to go through the pile of paperwork to make sure we understood every piece. Happily, it's not as scary this time around, but it's still tedious. Now to fill out lots of forms, order copies of birth/marriage certificates, and get reacquainted with our local notary.
We also scheduled our first meeting with our new social worker for Monday. It sounds like a getting-to-know-you/are-you-sure-what-you're-doing/do-you-understand-all-these-forms kind of meeting. So not terribly exciting either, but all progress.
We also scheduled our first meeting with our new social worker for Monday. It sounds like a getting-to-know-you/are-you-sure-what-you're-doing/do-you-understand-all-these-forms kind of meeting. So not terribly exciting either, but all progress.
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
It's that time again...
The blog is back, and that means the search is on for another future O'Donnell. Here's what we know so far.
Guatemala has closed its international adoption program while it reformats it to conform to the Hague regulations. With no idea how long that will take (it will probably take a lot of work to remake the program to fit into the new framework), we aren't holding our breath, and had to choose another country.
We have chosen China, and specifically the Waiting Child program which includes children with medical needs. That's the short answer. Here's the long one.
As recently as five years ago, abandonments of girls was high due to the combination of the one-child policy and the long-standing cultural preference for boys. Parents around the world responded in a big way, and tens of thousands of adoptive parents made homes for those little girls. However, in five years a lot has changed. Rights for women are advancing in China, abandonments are way down, and domestic adoption is up. These are all great things, but the result is that there are many fewer children available to be adopted by those tens of thousands of potential adoptive parents. Practically this situation has meant a very long wait for young children without medical needs, and because orphanages receive money from the international adoption process to help run their facility, it has also unfortunately resulted in some degree of child trafficking. We do not feel comfortable being part of the demand which creates this situation (it is still quite unclear how widespread it is).
However, the increasing pollution in China has resulted in an increased percentage of children born with congenital defects, and a combination of medical expenses and social discrimination against people with disabilities has left many children with medical needs in need of second homes. We are currently doing our homework researching some of these needs.
Boy or girl? Don't know yet. Won't know until we get the specific file for our child. However, because the children in need of adoption have been girls for so long, many families come into the adoption process with a "girl-only" mindset, meaning that there are many little boys waiting. We'll see!
We took our first official step today, attending an organizational meeting for a potential agency. We have chosen a new agency, not because the old one wasn't great to us and acting ethically in Guatemala, but because we learned post-adoption that they financially support an organization with which we vehemently disagree (maybe I'll rant more on this another time) called the National Council for Adoption (it sounds nice, but it's not). We just couldn't give money to an agency which would in some degree end up funding this organization which makes me so angry it gives me the shivers. We have already started the process somewhat, of course, researching this agency and starting homework on medical needs. Next step is to do more homework into those needs, talk with local families who have worked with this agency and handled some of the needs we are considering, and then file our formal application. We'll keep you posted!
Oh, and please do not talk with Gus about the adoption. We are not planning to discuss it with him until the process is much closer to completion--it's just too long for a small person to wait for something to happen.
Guatemala has closed its international adoption program while it reformats it to conform to the Hague regulations. With no idea how long that will take (it will probably take a lot of work to remake the program to fit into the new framework), we aren't holding our breath, and had to choose another country.
We have chosen China, and specifically the Waiting Child program which includes children with medical needs. That's the short answer. Here's the long one.
As recently as five years ago, abandonments of girls was high due to the combination of the one-child policy and the long-standing cultural preference for boys. Parents around the world responded in a big way, and tens of thousands of adoptive parents made homes for those little girls. However, in five years a lot has changed. Rights for women are advancing in China, abandonments are way down, and domestic adoption is up. These are all great things, but the result is that there are many fewer children available to be adopted by those tens of thousands of potential adoptive parents. Practically this situation has meant a very long wait for young children without medical needs, and because orphanages receive money from the international adoption process to help run their facility, it has also unfortunately resulted in some degree of child trafficking. We do not feel comfortable being part of the demand which creates this situation (it is still quite unclear how widespread it is).
However, the increasing pollution in China has resulted in an increased percentage of children born with congenital defects, and a combination of medical expenses and social discrimination against people with disabilities has left many children with medical needs in need of second homes. We are currently doing our homework researching some of these needs.
Boy or girl? Don't know yet. Won't know until we get the specific file for our child. However, because the children in need of adoption have been girls for so long, many families come into the adoption process with a "girl-only" mindset, meaning that there are many little boys waiting. We'll see!
We took our first official step today, attending an organizational meeting for a potential agency. We have chosen a new agency, not because the old one wasn't great to us and acting ethically in Guatemala, but because we learned post-adoption that they financially support an organization with which we vehemently disagree (maybe I'll rant more on this another time) called the National Council for Adoption (it sounds nice, but it's not). We just couldn't give money to an agency which would in some degree end up funding this organization which makes me so angry it gives me the shivers. We have already started the process somewhat, of course, researching this agency and starting homework on medical needs. Next step is to do more homework into those needs, talk with local families who have worked with this agency and handled some of the needs we are considering, and then file our formal application. We'll keep you posted!
Oh, and please do not talk with Gus about the adoption. We are not planning to discuss it with him until the process is much closer to completion--it's just too long for a small person to wait for something to happen.
Friday, March 28, 2008
He's a Yankee Doodle Dandy
Well, we're now really finished. Gus went to family court yesterday (required to wait 6 months after coming home) to re-adopt in Massachusetts. We signed a little piece of paper formalizing his name change, the judge let him bang the gavel, and Gus is now an American citizen.
And with that, there's no more to say here until there's another future O'Donnell to talk about. Thank you for your kind attention over the past 2 years. See you next time.
Friday, July 20, 2007
Antigua and back home
(The comma is back, and so are we!)
Antigua is a much friendlier place for American tourists than Guatemala City. When we got there, Jacobo drove us around the town (didn't take too long; it's only about 100 square blocks) and to our hotel, the Posada Lazos Fuertes. If you recall our previous post about organizations to which we contribute, you'll recall Safe Passage, the organization that helps kids who otherwise would be foraging through the Guatemala City dump. They own the hotel we stayed at. Most of the other occupants were Safe Passage volunteers, including a church youth group from Maine we met. Makes for a noisy hotel, but quite pretty. The town is quite attractive, too. We spent the next two and a half days roaming around the streets, looking at jade in shops, and playing with Gus in the Parque Central. Good food and a lot of fun. The worst part of the weekend was trying to get Gus to bed for naps.
Monday at noon Jacobo came back to pick us up for the drive back to Guatemala City. At this point we were still planning to fly home the next day. Oscar was going to pick up Gus's visa at the embassy for us and deliver it to our hotel at 4. He did so, but soon after he left Rebekah's sharp eyes noticed that the visa had Gus's name spelled wrong (Guastavo instead of Gustavo). We called Oscar immediately, and he met me at the embassy again a few minutes later. By now the place was closed for the night but Oscar managed to talk our way back in. Inside they informed us that there was no way we could get a revised visa on Gus's passport before our 6:30 flight the next morning. Still don't understand why not; clearly all they had to do was change a field on a record in some database and reprint the form, but that's bureaucracy for you. Chagrined, I walked back to the hotel and informed Reb that we had to change our flights and stay an extra day. We did so, and prepared for another 24 hours of confinement (remember, we couldn't leave the hotel with Gus in Guatemala City).
Tuesday turned out to be not so bad. We ate at the hotel restaurant; we played around with Gus; we packed, and we had internet access again, so we called people via Skype. The embassy had our corrected visa ready by 9:00 am. Nothing else to report there. One thing I will say about our hotels: you don't drink tap water in Guatemala or risk gastrointestinal unpleasantness, so you have to rely on the agua pura, or bottled water. The Lazos Fuertes in Antigua recognized this and had unlimited free water available in those water coolers you see in offices. At the San Carlos, you had to pay for it: Q10 per pint. Not expensive, I know, but it's definitely a point against them in my book.
Wednesday we flew home. We had a long layover in Houston, so after we spent an hour in the Homeland Security back office dealing with immigration, we got to introduce Gus to my family. That was a high point, but just about the only high point. The second leg of our flight was delayed two hours, the first hour due to weather in Boston, and the second due to electrical issues with our plane. It was really rough sitting there, Gus crying and hungry in his car seat and us unable to do anything about it because we needed to save his bottle for takeoff so that he wouldn't have ear troubles. Once we did take off, though, he slept through the entire 4 hours.
And so we're home. Hotel life definitely isn't the best way to start a parent-child relationship, but I think we made the best of it. We can get him on a proper schedule now, and we can start to wean him off the sugar-laden Guatemalan formula and cereal he's been eating (seriously, the stuff smells like hot chocolate mix). It's good to be back.
Antigua is a much friendlier place for American tourists than Guatemala City. When we got there, Jacobo drove us around the town (didn't take too long; it's only about 100 square blocks) and to our hotel, the Posada Lazos Fuertes. If you recall our previous post about organizations to which we contribute, you'll recall Safe Passage, the organization that helps kids who otherwise would be foraging through the Guatemala City dump. They own the hotel we stayed at. Most of the other occupants were Safe Passage volunteers, including a church youth group from Maine we met. Makes for a noisy hotel, but quite pretty. The town is quite attractive, too. We spent the next two and a half days roaming around the streets, looking at jade in shops, and playing with Gus in the Parque Central. Good food and a lot of fun. The worst part of the weekend was trying to get Gus to bed for naps.
Monday at noon Jacobo came back to pick us up for the drive back to Guatemala City. At this point we were still planning to fly home the next day. Oscar was going to pick up Gus's visa at the embassy for us and deliver it to our hotel at 4. He did so, but soon after he left Rebekah's sharp eyes noticed that the visa had Gus's name spelled wrong (Guastavo instead of Gustavo). We called Oscar immediately, and he met me at the embassy again a few minutes later. By now the place was closed for the night but Oscar managed to talk our way back in. Inside they informed us that there was no way we could get a revised visa on Gus's passport before our 6:30 flight the next morning. Still don't understand why not; clearly all they had to do was change a field on a record in some database and reprint the form, but that's bureaucracy for you. Chagrined, I walked back to the hotel and informed Reb that we had to change our flights and stay an extra day. We did so, and prepared for another 24 hours of confinement (remember, we couldn't leave the hotel with Gus in Guatemala City).
Tuesday turned out to be not so bad. We ate at the hotel restaurant; we played around with Gus; we packed, and we had internet access again, so we called people via Skype. The embassy had our corrected visa ready by 9:00 am. Nothing else to report there. One thing I will say about our hotels: you don't drink tap water in Guatemala or risk gastrointestinal unpleasantness, so you have to rely on the agua pura, or bottled water. The Lazos Fuertes in Antigua recognized this and had unlimited free water available in those water coolers you see in offices. At the San Carlos, you had to pay for it: Q10 per pint. Not expensive, I know, but it's definitely a point against them in my book.
Wednesday we flew home. We had a long layover in Houston, so after we spent an hour in the Homeland Security back office dealing with immigration, we got to introduce Gus to my family. That was a high point, but just about the only high point. The second leg of our flight was delayed two hours, the first hour due to weather in Boston, and the second due to electrical issues with our plane. It was really rough sitting there, Gus crying and hungry in his car seat and us unable to do anything about it because we needed to save his bottle for takeoff so that he wouldn't have ear troubles. Once we did take off, though, he slept through the entire 4 hours.
And so we're home. Hotel life definitely isn't the best way to start a parent-child relationship, but I think we made the best of it. We can get him on a proper schedule now, and we can start to wean him off the sugar-laden Guatemalan formula and cereal he's been eating (seriously, the stuff smells like hot chocolate mix). It's good to be back.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
And then they disappeared for a week
(Note to the reader: the comma key is still out of commission on this computer so continued apologies to any Lynne Truss fans out there.)
It turns out that once you have children you no longer have much free time left for blogging. Go figure. We're back in Guatemala City now and planning to come home tomorrow morning. The original plan was to come back today of course but more on that later.
Thursday morning Reb and I went to a couple of nearby museums (musea?) the first featuring old Mayan pots and whatnot and the second featuring new Mayan fabrics and textiles. Pictures are available on the internets. After that we walked back to the hotel and was surprised to find Gus and his foster parents there waiting for us. We were supposed to meet at 1 and it was 12:30 but they'd had a long drive out from Quetzeltenango (also known as Xela for some reason). It was rather awkward. Gus was asleep and the foster parents didn't speak any English so we recruited a nice hotel employee to translate for us for half an hour before Oscar our Bethany rep arrived. We discussed things like schedules and how long a drive it was from
Xela to Guatemala City. Oscar is all business. No small talk for that man. He showed up and said "Hello how are you let's talk about the baby's schedule." Around then we decided it would be a bad idea to let Gus sleep through the hand-off so we woke him up and passed him around. Naturally he was pretty wary of us. Finally Oscar and the foster parents left and that was when Gus started sobbing uncontrollably. He didn't stop for 4 hours except for a short interval when he cried himself to sleep. Finally though that evening he seemed to have worked through the initial grieving process and actually smiled at us before he went to bed.
Friday morning Gus woke up all smiles. We fed him cereal and gave him a bottle and took off for the embassy which happens to be next door to the hotel. We were feeling pretty smug about the amount of time it took to be out the door. Our alarm woke us up at 6 and we met Oscar at 7:05 dressed showered and fed. You're not allowed to take pictures of the embassy so I can't post one but imagine any government building built between 1960 and 1975 and you're pretty close. The waiting room resembled the DMV. They batch all the adoptions together at the same time so there were about 25 Guatemalan babies and American parents hanging out in there. Pretty crowded. We were in there about 2 hours. They asked us questions about making sure we fulfilled the requirements for adoption in our state (or commonwealth in our case) and had us swear an oath that we would re-adopt Gus when we got home. The whole thing took about two hours after which they told us his visa would be ready Monday at 3:30. Oscar told us that he would pick up the visa for us and deliver it to us at the hotel.
That was the last official business we had to do till then so we had arranged to spend the weekend in Antigua Guatemala. Guatemala City is smelly. There are a lot of old cars with diesel engines floating around including the GC public transportation system which consists of these red "chicken buses" which drive up and down the avenidas. They're crazy. Usually packed full of commuters and a couple guys hanging out the open doors as if it's a garbage truck. Also due to cultural misunderstandings about Americans adopting Guatemalan babies (ask us about them sometime) it would have been unwise to leave the hotel with Gus unaccompanied. It's different in Antigua. I was personally surprised at the sheer number of Americans there were there. Many American foster parents and young fresh out of college kids either volunteering or learning Spanish. Jacobo (our driver who picked us up at the airport) drove us over there that afternoon. Gorgeous drive through the mountains. I'll save the weekend in Antigua for another post.
It turns out that once you have children you no longer have much free time left for blogging. Go figure. We're back in Guatemala City now and planning to come home tomorrow morning. The original plan was to come back today of course but more on that later.
Thursday morning Reb and I went to a couple of nearby museums (musea?) the first featuring old Mayan pots and whatnot and the second featuring new Mayan fabrics and textiles. Pictures are available on the internets. After that we walked back to the hotel and was surprised to find Gus and his foster parents there waiting for us. We were supposed to meet at 1 and it was 12:30 but they'd had a long drive out from Quetzeltenango (also known as Xela for some reason). It was rather awkward. Gus was asleep and the foster parents didn't speak any English so we recruited a nice hotel employee to translate for us for half an hour before Oscar our Bethany rep arrived. We discussed things like schedules and how long a drive it was from
Xela to Guatemala City. Oscar is all business. No small talk for that man. He showed up and said "Hello how are you let's talk about the baby's schedule." Around then we decided it would be a bad idea to let Gus sleep through the hand-off so we woke him up and passed him around. Naturally he was pretty wary of us. Finally Oscar and the foster parents left and that was when Gus started sobbing uncontrollably. He didn't stop for 4 hours except for a short interval when he cried himself to sleep. Finally though that evening he seemed to have worked through the initial grieving process and actually smiled at us before he went to bed.
Friday morning Gus woke up all smiles. We fed him cereal and gave him a bottle and took off for the embassy which happens to be next door to the hotel. We were feeling pretty smug about the amount of time it took to be out the door. Our alarm woke us up at 6 and we met Oscar at 7:05 dressed showered and fed. You're not allowed to take pictures of the embassy so I can't post one but imagine any government building built between 1960 and 1975 and you're pretty close. The waiting room resembled the DMV. They batch all the adoptions together at the same time so there were about 25 Guatemalan babies and American parents hanging out in there. Pretty crowded. We were in there about 2 hours. They asked us questions about making sure we fulfilled the requirements for adoption in our state (or commonwealth in our case) and had us swear an oath that we would re-adopt Gus when we got home. The whole thing took about two hours after which they told us his visa would be ready Monday at 3:30. Oscar told us that he would pick up the visa for us and deliver it to us at the hotel.
That was the last official business we had to do till then so we had arranged to spend the weekend in Antigua Guatemala. Guatemala City is smelly. There are a lot of old cars with diesel engines floating around including the GC public transportation system which consists of these red "chicken buses" which drive up and down the avenidas. They're crazy. Usually packed full of commuters and a couple guys hanging out the open doors as if it's a garbage truck. Also due to cultural misunderstandings about Americans adopting Guatemalan babies (ask us about them sometime) it would have been unwise to leave the hotel with Gus unaccompanied. It's different in Antigua. I was personally surprised at the sheer number of Americans there were there. Many American foster parents and young fresh out of college kids either volunteering or learning Spanish. Jacobo (our driver who picked us up at the airport) drove us over there that afternoon. Gorgeous drive through the mountains. I'll save the weekend in Antigua for another post.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Innocents Abroad
Please forgive my punctuation in this post; we borrowed a lightweight laptop to bring down with us and the comma key doesn't work. It is 19:30 local time here in Guatemala City. Guatemala runs on Central Time but they don't honor Daylight Savings Time. So Guatemala runs on the same time as most of Indiana.
After two rather long flights we arrived this morning at the GC airport. Customs and immigration were a breeze; they barely glanced at the forms. After passing through customs we encountered a large mob of Guatemalans congregating outside the exit all of whom either appeared to be waiting for someone or offering us a ride. We quickly found the gentleman we'd actually arranged a ride from. His name is Jacobo and he served as our tour guide for the next two hours. He showed us quite a bit of Guatemala City and not just the nice parts either. Most of the tour was driving but at one point he parked the car and gave us a look-see at the Catedral Metropolitana (we learned something new: a church cannot be called a cathedral unless it has a special chair for the bishop) and the National Palace. I've posted pictures I took during the tour on our Flickr page. Reb was falling asleep at this point so we had Jacobo drive us to our hotel where we checked in and took a nap.
After waking up I turned on the computer to see what kinds of wireless internet options were available. Turns out the wireless works just fine here although Google and Blogger noticed the change of locale and helpfully translated all its web pages into Spanish for me. I'm quickly coming to terms with the vast amount of Spanish that I don't know. Thank God for Rebekah.
At this point we were getting hungry; we'd just had a couple granola bars for lunch. We went to the concierge desk and changed about $200US into quetzales and asked for a restaurant recommendation. He pointed us to an authentic Guatemalan restaurant called Kacao. We walked over there and discovered that the place didn't open until 6 so we wandered around for half an hour until then. We discovered a book store and passed most of the time in there. All kinds of stuff in there including Nathanial Hawthorne's classic La Letra Roja and Barack Obama's The Audacity of Hope sadly not translated into Spanish. We bought a couple board books for Gus.
Finally we went back to Kacao. It was excellent. I get the impression it's a bit of a tourist trap; all the wait staff were wearing traditional Mayan outfits and the restaurant had a domed thatched roof (think Disney World's Polynesian resort and you'll get the idea). The food was great. We had tamales as an appetizer and then we ordered two different Guatemalan dishes both of which arrived in the form of a soup. We stuffed ourselves. Of the five couples in the restaurant with us I think three were adoptive parents or about to become adoptive parents. However the waiters didn't use English with us at all. Reb did great. I was able to contribute a "una cerveza por favor" and several graciases but that was about it.
That wraps up our day. Bed time. Tomorrow we meet our son!
After two rather long flights we arrived this morning at the GC airport. Customs and immigration were a breeze; they barely glanced at the forms. After passing through customs we encountered a large mob of Guatemalans congregating outside the exit all of whom either appeared to be waiting for someone or offering us a ride. We quickly found the gentleman we'd actually arranged a ride from. His name is Jacobo and he served as our tour guide for the next two hours. He showed us quite a bit of Guatemala City and not just the nice parts either. Most of the tour was driving but at one point he parked the car and gave us a look-see at the Catedral Metropolitana (we learned something new: a church cannot be called a cathedral unless it has a special chair for the bishop) and the National Palace. I've posted pictures I took during the tour on our Flickr page. Reb was falling asleep at this point so we had Jacobo drive us to our hotel where we checked in and took a nap.
After waking up I turned on the computer to see what kinds of wireless internet options were available. Turns out the wireless works just fine here although Google and Blogger noticed the change of locale and helpfully translated all its web pages into Spanish for me. I'm quickly coming to terms with the vast amount of Spanish that I don't know. Thank God for Rebekah.
At this point we were getting hungry; we'd just had a couple granola bars for lunch. We went to the concierge desk and changed about $200US into quetzales and asked for a restaurant recommendation. He pointed us to an authentic Guatemalan restaurant called Kacao. We walked over there and discovered that the place didn't open until 6 so we wandered around for half an hour until then. We discovered a book store and passed most of the time in there. All kinds of stuff in there including Nathanial Hawthorne's classic La Letra Roja and Barack Obama's The Audacity of Hope sadly not translated into Spanish. We bought a couple board books for Gus.
Finally we went back to Kacao. It was excellent. I get the impression it's a bit of a tourist trap; all the wait staff were wearing traditional Mayan outfits and the restaurant had a domed thatched roof (think Disney World's Polynesian resort and you'll get the idea). The food was great. We had tamales as an appetizer and then we ordered two different Guatemalan dishes both of which arrived in the form of a soup. We stuffed ourselves. Of the five couples in the restaurant with us I think three were adoptive parents or about to become adoptive parents. However the waiters didn't use English with us at all. Reb did great. I was able to contribute a "una cerveza por favor" and several graciases but that was about it.
That wraps up our day. Bed time. Tomorrow we meet our son!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
The beginning is near
Tonight we're heading to the airport to catch a 5:35 am flight to Guatemala. We have something like 4x as much luggage as we've ever needed. Yikes!
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Travel Dates
The pink slip has arrived (via email). We're expected at the Embassy on July 13 bright and early in the morning. That's a Friday, and Gus's visa won't be available for pickup until Monday, so it'll work out that we're there for almost a full week since we have to stay the weekend. We'll go to Antigua for the weekend, since we hear it's a much nicer place than the capital.
Rough schedule:
Rough schedule:
- Wed. 7/11: Fly down to Guatemala City
- Thurs. 7/12: Gus gets handed over to us; we meet his foster mother
- Fri. 7/13: Embassy appointment
- Sat. and Sun 7/14-15: Vacation in Antigua, Guatemala
- Mon. 7/16: Get Gus's visa from the Embassy
- Tues. 7/17: Back to Los Estados Unidos
Monday, June 25, 2007
What about the others?
Of course we're completely pumped that Gus will be arriving home soon, but our excitement over his arrival doesn't remove the elephant in the room: what about the other children? Not long after we chose to build our family through adoption, we started to ask this question. We are thrilled to be the family for our children, even though it's not fair that they should need a second family. But what about the children who lose their first family and don't have a second family either? We can't adopt every child who needs a home.
We aren't the first people to ask this question, of course. Half the Sky, a non-profit foundation which provides love, education, and foster families for an increasing number of children who are without homes in China was founded by a family asking this question about the children who they had seen in their daughter's orphanage. Since its founding in 1998 and the opening of its first pilot program in 2000, Half the Sky has expanded to serve thousands of children in its 30 centers in China.
We are proud to support Half the Sky--but the question "What about the others?" is really two questions. The first is, "What happens to the children who have lost their first families?" This issue is what Half the Sky addresses. Although we value Half the Sky's work in loving and educating children in orphanages, its work does not answer the second question, "Why do so many children lose their first families to begin with?" In this case, there's very little that we as Americans can do about that problem, because it is rooted in governmental action and social norms.
However, we can do something about that problem in Guatemala. Most of the relinquishments in Guatemala are rooted in poverty and lack of education. We cannot change that Gus needs a second family right now, but if we could help the families before they have children whose care they cannot sustain, then we could help reduce the number of children in Gus's situation who need a second family. And by solving the second problem, we would also solve the first.
With this goal in mind, we recently evaluated a number of charitable organizations that work in Guatemala and around the world. There are many worthy organizations that work with children who are growing up in orphanages or on the streets of Guatemala, but we wanted to focus our efforts mainly on prevention. We found three organizations which we are now proud to support. We wanted to bring them to your attention so that you could learn what efforts are being put forth to help keep children in their first families in Guatemala, and to assist in those efforts if you choose. We feel that as adoptive parents we bear a special responsibility to the children who are missing their first families and who, for some reason, are not in Gus's place to come home to ours (or to other loving families). And we hope that with our help, Gus will be one of the last children in Guatemala to need a second home.
Safe Passage works with the families whose livelihoods depend on the Guatemala City dump. These families, who were profiled in the Oscar-nominated short documentary "Recycled Life," are mainly indigenous Mayans who were forced from their land during the civil war. The parents daily dig through the trash, but children were banned after a methane explosion in 2005. Safe Passage works with those children and their families to give them a way out of poverty, so that the next generation will not look forward to a "career" of digging through the dump. In Guatemala, school is free but the uniforms and materials required to attend it are not. Safe Passage provides uniforms, after-school tutoring, music and sports, nutrition, and medicine for the children. They also offer literacy tutoring for the parents.
Freedom from Hunger is a microloan organization (this concept has become much better known since Mohammad Yunus won the 2006 Nobel Peace Prize for his work in microloans, but it's not a new idea. FFH was founded in 1946). It provides small loans and business advice to people (usually women) to start small businesses. Along with the business assistance they provide education on health and nutrition, which along with the extra income significantly improves the health and outlook of the family. Repayment of the loans allows new loans to be made and more families to better care for themselves.
Agros International is the most innovative charity we've seen yet. It focuses on an entire rural community, first helping them secure a loan as a group for land for their community. The land is key, because in Guatemala and other places, the indigenous people were forcibly removed from their land and communities. Their way of life was destroyed and they were given "career options" like digging through the Guatemala City garbage dump. Agros begins with a community looking to work together to start over. It finds land for that community, then helps them succeed with community education, infrastructure assistance, and microloans. As the community flourishes they are able to repay the loans, which are then used to secure a land loan for another community.
We feel that it is a great gift to be able to help Gus's people--it is a privilege, like the privilege of being his parents. Of course we would be delighted to discuss any of these organizations further in person, and we hope that as some of you are looking for gifts for Gus that you would also or instead consider a gift to his people in his honor.
We aren't the first people to ask this question, of course. Half the Sky, a non-profit foundation which provides love, education, and foster families for an increasing number of children who are without homes in China was founded by a family asking this question about the children who they had seen in their daughter's orphanage. Since its founding in 1998 and the opening of its first pilot program in 2000, Half the Sky has expanded to serve thousands of children in its 30 centers in China.
We are proud to support Half the Sky--but the question "What about the others?" is really two questions. The first is, "What happens to the children who have lost their first families?" This issue is what Half the Sky addresses. Although we value Half the Sky's work in loving and educating children in orphanages, its work does not answer the second question, "Why do so many children lose their first families to begin with?" In this case, there's very little that we as Americans can do about that problem, because it is rooted in governmental action and social norms.
However, we can do something about that problem in Guatemala. Most of the relinquishments in Guatemala are rooted in poverty and lack of education. We cannot change that Gus needs a second family right now, but if we could help the families before they have children whose care they cannot sustain, then we could help reduce the number of children in Gus's situation who need a second family. And by solving the second problem, we would also solve the first.
With this goal in mind, we recently evaluated a number of charitable organizations that work in Guatemala and around the world. There are many worthy organizations that work with children who are growing up in orphanages or on the streets of Guatemala, but we wanted to focus our efforts mainly on prevention. We found three organizations which we are now proud to support. We wanted to bring them to your attention so that you could learn what efforts are being put forth to help keep children in their first families in Guatemala, and to assist in those efforts if you choose. We feel that as adoptive parents we bear a special responsibility to the children who are missing their first families and who, for some reason, are not in Gus's place to come home to ours (or to other loving families). And we hope that with our help, Gus will be one of the last children in Guatemala to need a second home.
Safe Passage works with the families whose livelihoods depend on the Guatemala City dump. These families, who were profiled in the Oscar-nominated short documentary "Recycled Life," are mainly indigenous Mayans who were forced from their land during the civil war. The parents daily dig through the trash, but children were banned after a methane explosion in 2005. Safe Passage works with those children and their families to give them a way out of poverty, so that the next generation will not look forward to a "career" of digging through the dump. In Guatemala, school is free but the uniforms and materials required to attend it are not. Safe Passage provides uniforms, after-school tutoring, music and sports, nutrition, and medicine for the children. They also offer literacy tutoring for the parents.
Freedom from Hunger is a microloan organization (this concept has become much better known since Mohammad Yunus won the 2006 Nobel Peace Prize for his work in microloans, but it's not a new idea. FFH was founded in 1946). It provides small loans and business advice to people (usually women) to start small businesses. Along with the business assistance they provide education on health and nutrition, which along with the extra income significantly improves the health and outlook of the family. Repayment of the loans allows new loans to be made and more families to better care for themselves.
Agros International is the most innovative charity we've seen yet. It focuses on an entire rural community, first helping them secure a loan as a group for land for their community. The land is key, because in Guatemala and other places, the indigenous people were forcibly removed from their land and communities. Their way of life was destroyed and they were given "career options" like digging through the Guatemala City garbage dump. Agros begins with a community looking to work together to start over. It finds land for that community, then helps them succeed with community education, infrastructure assistance, and microloans. As the community flourishes they are able to repay the loans, which are then used to secure a land loan for another community.
We feel that it is a great gift to be able to help Gus's people--it is a privilege, like the privilege of being his parents. Of course we would be delighted to discuss any of these organizations further in person, and we hope that as some of you are looking for gifts for Gus that you would also or instead consider a gift to his people in his honor.
Friday, June 22, 2007
Final Review
We got an email today from the agency telling us that our paperwork is now at the US Embassy awaiting final review. They told us that at this point it typically takes 3-4 business days for them to review it, at which point they'll issue the long-awaited pink slip with our Embassy appointment date. The appointment dates are typically 10 days after that.
All this means that we're about 2-3 weeks from travel time. Our abogado is really on the ball down there.
By the way, we've been brushing up on our Espanol for the last few weeks (I'm a complete Spanish newbie, so "brushing up" is a very kind way of putting it). We really recommend Coffee Break Spanish, which is a podcast series that teaches Spanish in very small chunks (about 20 minutes a week). Check it out.
Still much to do. I've finished our paperwork, but we still need to pack and buy lots of little stuff we're going to need. And we're out of town next weekend. Well, we can shop in Philly as well as we can here.
All this means that we're about 2-3 weeks from travel time. Our abogado is really on the ball down there.
By the way, we've been brushing up on our Espanol for the last few weeks (I'm a complete Spanish newbie, so "brushing up" is a very kind way of putting it). We really recommend Coffee Break Spanish, which is a podcast series that teaches Spanish in very small chunks (about 20 minutes a week). Check it out.
Still much to do. I've finished our paperwork, but we still need to pack and buy lots of little stuff we're going to need. And we're out of town next weekend. Well, we can shop in Philly as well as we can here.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
This is how I roll
Two new acquisitions of note to report. Reb has recently learned to knit, and of course the first project she decided
to take on was a wool diaper cover for the young'un. He'll be stylin'. It turned out really well, I must say. Note the drawstring waistband.The other recent acquisition was a gift from some new friends who have two Guatemalan children themselves. I don't really know what it's called, but I fully expect him to have a blast bouncing around in it, waking the neighbors downstairs.
Pressing on!
We got the email today telling us that we have been approved by PGN, exactly two months after the last time that we went in. We are now out of the Guatemalan attorney general's office and moving on to the next (and final) step!
Now there are only two things left that need to happen before we get the travel go-ahead. First, Gus's first mother signs off on the adoption for the third time (she's done it twice already). At that point, as far as Guatemala is concerned, Gus is ours. Then the US Embassy works on the adoption visa for him so that he can come home with us.
Typical (I repeat, typical, and our mileage may vary) wait times from this point until our final travel date are 6 to 8 weeks. We'll probably only get a week's notice of our court date. In the meantime, we have some forms to gather to take down with us: tax forms, immunization records, the I-864, and a copy of our home study.
Starting to freak out a little bit. We're definitely well into the third trimester now!
Now there are only two things left that need to happen before we get the travel go-ahead. First, Gus's first mother signs off on the adoption for the third time (she's done it twice already). At that point, as far as Guatemala is concerned, Gus is ours. Then the US Embassy works on the adoption visa for him so that he can come home with us.
Typical (I repeat, typical, and our mileage may vary) wait times from this point until our final travel date are 6 to 8 weeks. We'll probably only get a week's notice of our court date. In the meantime, we have some forms to gather to take down with us: tax forms, immunization records, the I-864, and a copy of our home study.
Starting to freak out a little bit. We're definitely well into the third trimester now!
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Status update
We just received word that we are still in PGN. No news is good news; at least we haven't been kicked out.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Pictures, Month Six
More pictures today. He's sitting up! And he's wearing the onesie his grandparents sent him! What a dapper young man our son is. I posted all the pictures to our usual Flickr account.We also got a status update today. We're still in PGN, and we've been there since 4/11. This is a good sign.
Friday, April 27, 2007
PGN, Round Three
We found out today that we were kicked out of PGN (the Guatemalan AG's office) a month ago, and on 4/11 we went back in for the third time. What was the issue this time? Another tilde, this time on the DNA consent form. It's a shame. The tilde used to be my favorite punctuation mark, with the interrobang a close second. Not anymore.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Recommended Reading
I read a fabulous book, the first I've read which is specifically tailored for the friends and family of an adopting family--that would be YOU! It gives dos and don'ts for grownups and tips on how to explain to your kids what has happened in the life of our kid. It's called "Cross-Cultural Adoption: How to Answer Questions" and is by Amy Coughlin and Caryn Abramowitz. Got it here via interlibrary loan, no problem--it's a quick and very helpful read. Please do!
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